Things To Do When Your Apartment Has No Internet

July 27, 2011 § 3 Comments

  • Go to work, since that’s why you’re here in the first place.
  • Take a walk! Like you don’t already know where to find food/beer/hobos in your neighborhood.
  • Microwave a burrito and experience the singular feeling of burning and freezing your mouth at once.
  • Stalk cafés with free wifi and develop instant vendettas against those that lack or limit it (I’m looking at you, Ost Café on the corner of 12th and Ave A)
  • Sit on your mattress.
  • Sit on the roof.
  • Sit on one of the two chairs in your kitchiving room.
  • Debate going to a movie, decide that maybe if you see 6 movies in 7 days you might have a problem.
  • Google “common wifi passwords” on your iPhone.
  • Read Reddit on your iPhone.
  • Check email, obsessively, on your iPhone.
  • End up at Starbucks, even though you’d rather be somewhere cooler, but dammit they are reliable and right by the subway stop and don’t charge for their wifi any more and you need tea for that sore throat you’ve developed anyway.

§ 3 Responses to Things To Do When Your Apartment Has No Internet

  • lexie says:

    related: things to do when your magsafe is broken and there are no apple stores in your country

  • shannon says:

    “Google common wifi passwords,” lol.
    When I didn’t have internet, I “borrowed” advance copies of some NOVA show from a year or two ago hosted by Neil DeGrass Tyson and watched those. One episode was about the guy who invented captcha, the word thingy that they make you type in on website sometimes to make sure you aren’t a robot, you know the ones that are super annoying because normal humans can’t read them anyway? Gosh, the internet is super annoying, you are better off without it.

  • shannon says:

    *”Borrowed” from work, by which I mean they were going to be thrown away anyway.

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